WELCOME ME BACK!!

Well, it has been a LONG time since I have written something here. But I think I am going to start back writing here - to put my thoughts and feelings down AND to put down what happens in my daily life. I don't think I need to worry about anyone reading it - I don't think many people ever read it when I gave them the blog address. And I really doubt that anyone in my family will read it (except maybe a sister).
Anyway - to start - I have been feeling pretty crappy this week. Ann, Carole and I were trying to get a family get-together going this year. I didn't want to be the one to have to organize it but somehow I wound up doing it anyway. Put out an e-mail - not much response. Mike and Jenny both said they would definitely be there. Thomas said his dad said yes. Rick said he couldn't - Austin still in school (this is over Memorial Day weekend). And of course I heard from Ann and Pat that they would be there. So - put out another e-mail telling the family that I needed to know this week yes or no as we needed to put reservations on a house if we were all going to get together. And then I heard a "maybe - but only for one night" from Jerry but daughters probably wouldn't come; Aunt Dixie had other plans for then; Michele said no they couldn't afford it (she needs to talk to her husband about saying yes to Thomas); and then Jenny (who had said yes) said she didn't know cause Alan might not be able to get off. Put the e-mail out on Sunday and here it is Tuesday night and that is all I have heard from. Put me in a downright depressed and then angry mood. I can't get this family to want to get to know each other for anything. My family newsletters and pleas for news from each family goes unanswered. I tell everyone when birthdays are coming up but no cards are ever sent to anyone. I know everyone gets busy with their own thing - but someday......they will all wish they had spent more time with family. I know I do but my words now are falling on very DEAF ears.
So....I am pretty sure the family get-together will be cancelled and Pat, Ann, Carole and I will probably get together ourselves and go to Branson. I am still hoping Larry and Marilyn can come but they probably won't. Vince had prostate surgery and may not be up to a trip and I understand that Marilyn would not want to leave him. And if Larry can't come (which I wish he would), maybe Betty would come. And I WILL NOT BE INVOLVED in planning another family get-together.
I have been talking with the Lord and I think I expect too much from my family and they have definitely been disappointing me. So now I won't expect ANYTHING from them and maybe I will be ok. I am not sending out any more family newsletters except to my siblings, Aunt Dixie, and Mike. And the birthday cards are now going to stop. I know it is petty - but for all the cards I have sent to EVERY MEMBER of my family for several years now, the only ones who send me cards are my siblings.
So starting now - things are going to change. I know who I can depend on and who really cares - my sisters and brother. But most of all - GOD CARES. Through all this and through everything in my life I know God is always there with me, beside me and guiding me. Thank you Lord!!