A DAY OF ANSWERED PRAYERS

Today was and still is a day of pain and sorrow. It hurts so much losing Thea. It was a difficult day and I am not looking forward to going to bed. I have never slept without her beside me when I have been home. It will be a very sleepless night.

But I must share with everyone what God did for me through all of this. He is such a wonderful God and He loves us so. But He showed me today just how much He loves me and was there for me constantly.

First - I have prayed for weeks that He would show me without a doubt when it was time to let Thea go. I did not want to do anything prematurely but also did not want to wait too long and have her suffering. Yesterday's x-ray was definitely the answer to that prayer. Then last night - she could not get comfortable and I could tell she was starting to hurt. So I also knew then it was time. Then I was afraid she would not make it through the night and asked God to PLEASE let her make it through the night. I did not want her to die a painful death. He answered that prayer also as she made it through the night.

He also last night gave me the poem that was on last night's blog. It was exactly what I needed and how I know Thea felt. He also let me know that today was the day that I had to let her go. I was hoping to go through the weekend. I was to have carpal tunnel surgery on my left hand today and was going to have the surgery and then decide what to do this weekend. I got home from work yesterday and the surgeon's office had a message to call them. They had to postpone my surgery at the last minute - all they would say was it wasn't Dr. Holbrook's fault. I wanted to tell them it was God's doing. He did not want me to wait the weekend on Thea.

And then finally, this morning - my friend Susan was going to meet me at the clinic and then drive me to the crematory. I told her I would be ok to drive but she said she would meet me there at 7:30. Around 7 am I was wishing I had asked her to pick me up at the house - I prayed and asked God to let her be close (she lives an hour away) so she could pick me up. I really didn't want to drive myself to the clinic. So I called Susan at 7 am and asked her where she was. SHE WAS SITTING IN MY DRIVEWAY!!! God is so awesome and He cares so much for me. I burst into tears and knew at that moment He was with me and would always be with me.

I am glad I was with Thea to the end and I know it was the right thing to do and the right time. It still hurts so very much. The hardest thing was leaving her at the crematory. Tonight will be very hard and I know I have many painful and sad times ahead of me. But I also know she is free of pain and she loved me and I loved her so much.

"Thank you Lord for loving me and thank you for your gift of Thea for 15 years. She gave me so much love and also shared her love with others. I know she will be missed by so many people - family and friends. Thank you Lord for all the answered prayers in the last 24 hours. I know you are always there for me but You showed me in such a strong way today just how awesome and loving You are. Even in this sad time I see Your Hand in my life and I Praise Your Name!!!"